Starting (not quite) from the beginning

Well, hello 2026: new year, new website, new blog… it’s all looking a bit fresh!

But hold on, this isn’t my first rodeo.

Like many before me, surrounding me, and indeed next in line, I’ve expressed a fair few musings across the blogosphere in my time. The journey has seen me self-reflect in worlds of employment, coaching, parenting and professional development. Everything from post topics to their degree of visibility have been led by which hat I’m wearing in the moment.

OK, wore, in the moment. I’m now either all out of hats, or I have far too many. I’m also a little rusty. So, as I start this next blog, I’ll loosen up by reflecting on where I am now and where this one may take me.

Who is Stevie Barnes?

It’s a good starting point, but unlikely to lead to a straightforward answer. Right now, I’m partly defined by being a PhD student. Well established within my late thirties, my years of wisdom also give me the honour of being a ‘mature’ student. I’m also a mum: forever my most important and motivating role.

I’m from a large family and grew up in a wonderful working-class town in the UK. I’ve always enjoyed learning. I’ve always been curious. I’ve probably always been a little rebellious. I love travel, adventure, music and authenticity. Professionally, my background is in Human Resources (I’ll save more on that for later posts).

I’m not one for labels. I’m aware I’m reeling them off. This, I’m quite confident, is an adaptive technique.

How I got here

I had a moment during the pandemic. We all did. For me, it was of the “now or never” variety. Having no idea what the future held, how much of it was left, and to what extent I had any control, I started thinking seriously about why I hadn’t done the things I wanted to do.

"Right moments don't get delivered, they get created."

My tolerance levels for waiting around are something of a myth, but I realised waiting was exactly what I had been doing. Waiting for the right moment, whether that was financially, emotionally, professionally, or spiritually. It was during this time, I realised right moments don’t get delivered, they get created.

Minimising, avoiding or rejecting the "The Waiting Place" just so happens to be one of my core motivators. (credit: Dr Seuss, 1990)

Armed with that nugget of wisdom, I created the moment that filled the gap. It was a gap that was leaving me unfulfilled, regretful and unchallenged. The one that was created when I left university aged 19.

As a teenager, I didn’t question Higher Education. I knew I was going to university, despite no one in my family having been before me. Despite it not being the expectation in my school. I read every prospectus (back then they were physical objects you could touch, hold and smell; a joy for me, but not for the local postman) and researched every subject. I knew exactly which programme and university I wanted to join.

I got there, had some incredible times and met some amazing people. I also started having seizures. It broke me physically and mentally. By the time of the Covid-19 pandemic, the need to heal the feeling of failure that had been following me around was long overdue.

In February 2021, I joined the Open University. Studying remotely and at my own pace meant I could work towards my degree alongside full-time employment. Initially, I enrolled on a Psychology degree, but I quickly became fascinated by the bigger picture of how people interact with societies. I switched to the BA(hons) Social Sciences programme. I loved it. My passion for the subject and achievement in assignments boosted my self-confidence. I achieved distinction in every module, eventually being awarded a first-class honours degree in 2024.

It was during a Criminology module that I was introduced to social research methods. My new love. I followed the BA with an MSc in Social Research Methods at UCL. It was a dream come true, but being a full-time mature student at an in-person university was not without challenge. Despite that, I proudly achieved a Distinction, not before receiving an unconditional offer to start my PhD with the same institution. More on all of that later too, but essentially, that all got me to where I am now.

Where I am now

Younger me had no expectations to get here, but she would be proud. I had never considered a PhD until I started my MSc. I’m not from circles where a PhD is the norm. Regardless, I am now in a position where I may be able to help expand those limited spaces.

There are a few reasons why I want to get a PhD:

• Because I know I can (and want to prove it to myself)

• Because I know others can too (and want to help open doors)

• Because I am passionate about my topic (and broader social inclusion)

• Because I don’t want to be a Mrs, Miss or Ms (Dr will do nicely)

• Because those who create knowledge, have access to it, and control it are a limited pool (and we need to change that, for the sake of all kind)

A few months in as a part-time student, I am at the very early stages of my PhD, developing my own research skills and delving deep into existing literature.

In this blog, I expect to share some of my journey, both as a PhD researcher and as a mature student. I’ll write about topics related to my academic and professional interests. This will include areas of social inclusion, diversity, and what makes a good workplace. It may also include specific research methods and theories. I am an advocate for participatory, trauma-informed and critical methods. I also want to make what I do accessible to others, which I hope will reflected in my language and writing style. My intention is definitely to write with a non-academic audience in mind.

I’ve registered steviebarnes.co.uk at the beginning of my PhD journey. It’s my little space on the internet. This blog is where I can look back on it in years to come and hopefully connect with others along the way.

Connections feels like a good place to start. Who else is blogging in this the new (and seemingly lonely!) world I’ve stepped into?

Please share any links or recommendations in the comments or by contacting me directly. I’m looking forward to making new connections, sharing and learning from others along the way.

This isn’t my first rodeo and no doubt it will not be my last. As I round off this first post off, I realise yes, the hats are still all there. Perhaps now is the time to get them organised - hat rack, anyone?